Changing Face of Marriage

I have had a really good experience in terms of domestic church. My parents have been taking us to Church each week for my entire life. My parents always taught us values like honesty, selflessness, and acceptance. Overall, my family presented a strong example of the domestic church. Clearly, the changing structure of marriage and family in today's world has several pros and cons. Like we talked about in class, real-life couples and most on tv shows and in movies these days participate in cohabitation. This can have cons, as many people decide to break up and move out when their is conflict instead of working through problems like a married couple living together for the first time would do. However, a pro of the evolution of marriage and family is that more people are being accepted in society. For example, gay people are being allowed to get married in many states, and this brings a whole new version of a family if the couple chooses to have children. I think that these different families can only help future generations to be more accepting of differences. The news about divorce rates and people with college degrees is great! I'm very happy to know that I'll be less likely to experience divorce/multiple marriages should I ever get married. If I end up having a family in the future, I don't think I will feel compelled to establish the domestic church in my home. I don't think compelled is the right word. I probably will establish it because I grew up with it and it helped shape me into a good person. So I don't think I'd be compelled; it would be a choice.

Papal Conclave

I think that the next pope will definitely have to address many big and possibly hot-button issues since our world is changing so much. For example, I think the new Pope will have to discuss gay marriage, the sex abuse scandal, contraception, women in the Church, involving the youth in the Church more, and many more. Though the Church already has established views on some of these topics, I think the new Pope will have to further explain these views or adapt them. I think the future of the Church needs general open-mindedness and acceptance of the fact that it may have to adjust to an ever-changing world and congregation. I think the new pope may face some challenges when it comes to working with young people. One of the Church's weaknesses right now is that it is not very inviting to young people who are a product of our modern world. I would like to think that being a woman in the Church is the same as being a man in the Church, but I don't think it is. I still feel like the Church holds on to this idea that women are the cause of a lot of sin; for example, I don't think the Church has ever really evolved from its view of women as temptresses. I think women in the Church need more of a voice. Let's face it: the Church is run by men in every way. Priests are always in control of parishes, a woman really can't become anything higher than a sister while priests can climb the ranks, and the only people allowed to vote for the pope are men! I think the Church would be much more relatable if women were able to give their perspective. If I could change one thing in the Church, I would have them change the words of the mass back to what they were before! It sounds dumb and petty, but it bothers me that now we say the blood of Christ was shed for "many" and not "all." This line and the changes in general do not reflect a Jesus that I have come to know in my life, and they make me feel isolated from the loving, accepting Church I thought I was a part of. I do think that there is room for democracy, even in the Church's current form. I believe that if the hierarchy of the Church could be adjusted to be more democratic and include women, the Church would already be progressing. Even in its current form, I think the Holy Spirit works in the hierarchy to help those in power make decisions that truly benefit the Church, its people, and its mission.

Dating: What's the Point?

I do not agree with the assertion that dating is just "practice for divorce." I think quite the opposite, actually: if a person never dates, how will he or she know what is needed for a successful relationship or how to resolve conflicts with a loved one? Most of my friends who have been in relationships have benefited. They learn how to communicate better and they learn what they like in other people. If my sister had had an "anti-dater" mindset, she probably would not have given her husband a chance in the first place. At the same time, I don't think that dating and the hook-up culture should be placed on the same level. I do not think that random hook-ups are beneficial like dating is. Hooking up does not involve commitment and emotional attachment like dating usually does. Moreover, hooking up is one way for people to just be used, and it can deter the development of strong relationships, as hook-ups are void of substance. Overall, I think that the hook-up culture is damaging to relationships, but dating, for the most part, can be a useful tool to better know oneself and how to have good relationships.

Gender and dating relationships

I found this article very interesting. I don't usually think about the many stereotypes and expectations that play into a dating and engagement scenario. Even though I don't like to play into stereotypes, it's weird how they enter into my life anyway. For example, if/when I get engaged in the far future, I would want my boyfriend to propose to me, and I would want it to be a surprise. I can't imagine being the one to propose! So even though I try to stay away from stereotypes, some of them have just been culturally ingrained in me. Even my parents' story reflects these stereotypes: though they had discussed getting married at some point, the proposal was a surprise and my dad was the one to propose.

I definitely agree with the reader, however, in that the article did mainly focus on women's expectations and stereotypes of men. However, I think that in dating and marriage situations, men hold stereotypes too. For example, most men propose but expect the woman to plan most of the wedding. In addition, I think men have many post-marriage stereotypes: the women will do the cooking and cleaning and helping with homework. Moreover, sometimes men don't like it when their wives make more money than them, even though it truly doesn't matter who does.

Overall, I think it is interesting how many subtle stereotypes and expectations there are in aspects of dating, engagements, and marriage. Maybe in the future more women will do the proposing!

America the Beautiful

After watching Gerren's story, I definitely think that her experiences display the effect that the modeling industry can have on people's views of themselves. When she was 12 and just starting out, she felt pretty and was having a lot of fun. But once she was older and faced more rejection, Gerren's view of herself changed. She even said she thought she was ugly. I think that the modeling industry can be very damaging to a girl's self-esteem and self-worth. The modeling industry is really a business of telling people they're pretty and skinny. So if a girl never gets scouted or doesn't have success in modeling, she thinks that she is not pretty. I do not think that the standard of beauty should rest on the shoulders of people who pay others because they think they look pretty. We are all beautiful in some way or another, and it doesn't have to be our looks.

Being a young woman in today's society is difficult. It's hard to truly understand oneself when there are outside forces, including the fashion industry, feeding us other messages. I have a pretty good sense of self-understanding I think, but it took a long time for me to get there. Understanding yourself is more than looking in a mirror, despite what society tells you. I think that today's society does have a really negative effect on the confidence of myself and my peers, simply because society always has its focus on one thing. Right now I think the focus of society is on being thin, so I feel like everyone my age is always thinking about that. However, I wish society learned to be broader, since people as a whole are not one certain way, and people are what make up society.

Becoming Who I Am

I very much agree with Palmer that vocation is more about understanding who we are than what we should become or think we should become. When I was younger I used to associate "vocation" with what I would be when I grew up, because that was what I considered a calling. I used to think of vocations like "teacher," "police officer," or "doctor." While those are literal vocations, I definitely agree with Palmer that the truest vocation is self-discovery. I now understand that in order to find my more title-oriented or professional vocation, I must first fulfill the vocation of completely and totally figuring out who I am.

Over the past year or so, I have begun to think like Palmer. In this past year, I think I've done more soul searching and self-reflection than ever before. This has led me to become more relaxed and at peace. I know my priorities am very content with my life. In this period of self-discovery, I've tried to balance school with being social and spending time with my family. For many years I would get so caught up in getting perfect scores because perfect scores meant a great high school, and perfect scores in high school meant a great college, and a great college was the only way to a great future. However, now I realize that there is so much more to a successful life than grades. The key to a successful life is being who I am, surrounding myself with people who accept me for that, and achieving goals that I set for myself, not that society sets for me. Therefore, I wholeheartedly agree with Palmer that everyone's common vocation is finding who we are. If everyone could see that, I think that the world we live in would be much happier and more successful.

My Mission Statement

My mission in life is to be the happiest I can be, which I think lies in helping others. I want to live a life filled with positivity and always see a bright side to every situation. I want to foster strong, fulfilling relationships throughout my life so that I can always have support and be there to support others. In my life, I will maintain my quirky individuality and pursue what I love: studying languages, traveling, and being of service to others. Hopefully someday I will fulfill my dream of joining the Peace Corps. Moreover, I want to continue to be an open, welcoming person--more than just "tolerant" of others' differences. Whether something is a small goal, such as doing well on a quiz, or a large one, like getting a scholarship to college, I will give 110% because even if I fail, at least I tried. I hope that I leave a positive mark on the people whose lives I have the honor of entering in some way, and I hope that I only let people do the same to me. My ultimate goal in life is to be happy. I will do whatever it takes to have a life that is happy and successful according to my standards, not those of someone else.

Sources of Identity

One of the factors that has affected who I am today is my family. No matter what, I can always count on my family to stick by me. My family is always supportive of me and loves me no matter what. Having their constant love and support is a huge motivator in my life. From my family I have learned so many things. I've learned how to be a good friend because your family members are almost like your first set of friends. I've also learned to respect everyone, which has made me a very nonjudgmental person and someone who genuinely likes being around people. Most importantly, my family has helped me to be who I am. I am comfortable being myself, and I have my family to thank for that.



Another factor that has affected who I am today is music. It's funny because I'm not a musical person. I used to play the piano and really want to start again, but other than that, I'm not a natural-born musician. However, music just moves through my life so much and is such a powerful force. It always calms me down, cheers me up, and pretty much does whatever I need. I think that music has made me a really strong person. I don't drink or do anything like that--I'd much prefer to go to a concert. When I'm at a concert I feel so free and yet so connected to everyone else in the room. Music has made me become more in tune with myself and in some weird way just guides me in life. Another example would be the music history course I took this year. I didn't want to take a study, so I opted to take this course. I had no idea that it would become like a little family. We have inside jokes and a secret Facebook group--an eight week course brought an eclectic group of Mounties together as friends. Music has made me a more easy-going, friendly person who is open to opportunities.

Finally, Spanish has affected who I am. That sounds really strange, but it's true: the Spanish language has had a huge influence on me. I never knew what I wanted to do with my life, and I still really don't, but now I know that it will involve Spanish. The idea that I can communicate with people in another way is inspiring. When I went to Mississippi sophomore year, I was able to use my shaky Spanish to speak to the little kids, and it was so powerful. I can't wait until I know even more Spanish (and hopefully other languages, too) and am able to help others, which is ultimately what I want to do with my life. Spanish has become a passion and has helped me to discover myself more and realize, at least a little bit, what my plan in life might be.

In the land of invisible women

What I found most shocking about this article was that many Yemeni girls are married at an extremely young age. The one young girl in the article was married at 12 years old. When I was 12, I was thinking about what I was going to wear to the CYO dance on Friday, not about the fact that I would be married to a 30 year old in a few days. I think it is disturbing that girls that young are married off, and that their parents generally support it.

Reading this article made me so grateful for the life I live. A 17 or 18 year old Yemeni girl would be covered head to toe in the traditional black garb. She would stay cooped up in her house all day, probably making sure everything was just right for her husband, who would have total control over her. She would not be allowed to speak her opinions, let alone admit that she had any at all. In my life, I am free to dress how I please and think what I want to think. I have no intentions of marrying anytime soon, and even when I do marry, I will not be treated like a slave by my husband. I am fortunate that I will be able to go to college and get a job doing whatever I want, unafraid to leave my house each day and be independent. Overall, I am thankful that I do not have to live the life of a young Yemeni woman. I hope that the situation of women in Yemen gets better, because women do not deserve to be treated like they are not even human beings.

Can forgiveness play a role in criminal justice?

After reading about restorative justice in the context of the heartbreaking tragedy that is the death of Ann Marie Grosmaire, I think that the idea of bringing forgiveness into the criminal justice system is very beneficial. I don't really think that restorative justice can quite be an alternative to the current justice system, but I think that the two should be used simultaneously and collaboratively. I think it's very possible and realistic to say that someday restorative justice will be a term that is widely known and a concept that is used daily. If people could use restorative justice instead of dehumanizing people, our world would be so much more forgiving, loving, and understanding. I think that restorative justice is very pertinent to Catholic Social Teaching, but I think it can easily be applied to many situations in life. Such an outlook could affect everyone's lives and make people more forgiving and compassionate--before bad things happen, not just after. Moreover, people would think more before they act because they would see situations from many perspectives. Overall, I think that applying restorative justice to the criminal justice system and life in general would be exceptionally valuable to society.